Technology: Always and Forever

I love technology.  

"But I still love technology...Always and forever."

I text.  I Skype.   I Facebook.  I blog.  On rare occasions, I even tweet.  In other words, I participate in all kinds of things that weren't even in the dictionary (and probably had yet to be invented) twenty years ago (or really even ten).

THEN....

NOW....

I regularly do things in my life that as a child I knew about only from The Jetsons.

Remember when the face of George's boss would pop up on a screen and they would have a conversation?! (Like that was ever going to happen in real life.....).



It wasn't really until Spring Break a few weeks ago, coupled with some interesting experiences of my own, that I began to question this amazing Jetson-like world I've been living in.

This year I decided to spend Spring Break in Arizona with my brother's family.  I loved being with them for a week--feeding the baby, playing cars with the two year old, reading stories, playing games, watching dinosaur shows, and having every piece of clothing in my suitcase spit up on.

Hard to believe this angel is a clothing-wrecker, right?

One afternoon, I took my nephew to the park to play on the swings.  As he began to swing, another girl about his age, Marcella, came up with her mom and began swinging on the swing next to him.  When he would laugh, she would laugh.  When she would talk, he would talk.  When he would roar, she would roar.

Just swingin' with Marcella

When they were about done swinging, she turned to him and said, "Hey, wanna slide?"
The next thing I knew, they were sliding, climbing, running, and chasing each other around the park, all the while laughing hysterically.  Unsure what to do, Marcella's mother an I--people from different walks of life--stood side by side watching them until we finally began a conversation.  As play time came to a close, the new best friends embraced and said goodbye as her mom and I gave a little wave with a, "Nice to meet you!"

I began to wonder what makes it so dang hard for us grownups to be like kids.  Why on earth did we stand there awkwardly, wondering what to do?  Why can't a grownup person just look at another grownup person and say, "Hey, wanna talk?!"

What if children acted like we do?  Can you imagine those little two and three year olds in the swing thinking:
"Man, I'd like to play but...I don't know.  I'm pretty sure her grandparents are from another country," 

or 

"I'm so embarrassed!  I knew I shouldn't have worn my blue polo.  The Thomas the Train shirt would have been way better," 

or

"Why did I wear my Crocs to the park?!  Mom was right!  You never know who you'll run into!"

As they played, my nephew ran more awkwardly, climbed more slowly, and fell more often than Marcella--because he was younger.  And you know what?  It didn't matter.  No two or three year old was thinking:

"I'm so bad at this!  Everyone's probably laughing at how clumsy I am.  I don't think I should come to the park anymore."

 So why do we as grownups do it to each other and to ourselves?
Why do we compare, judge, worry, fear, hold back, or feel self conscious?  Why would we rather stand by ourselves in the park when we are surrounded by other people?  Why can't we just be friends?

And this is where technology comes in...Because in a world where I have the opportunity to be more connected to anyone and everyone, globally, in a way that has never been possible in the history of mankind (unless you count the Jetsons), I am sometimes even more alone.

I live in a world where I can know who you are before I pick up the phone.  Meaning I can reject that call until I know what to say.  Or, I can simply ignore it altogether.

I live in a world where you can text me and I can take as long as I want to come up with the perfect response--which may or may not have been formulated entirely by me.  

I live in a world where I can look at every family vacation you have been on, see every friend you have, and know all about what you do and don't like without ever even needing to say hello to you in person.

I live in a world where I can look at all of your creations and achievements and children and compare myself to them without ever being inside your home to see what real life is like.

I live in a world where I can track how many people follow me, read about me, and electronically "care about me"--and yet can sit home alone to do it.

I live in a world where I can base my worth on how many of my 400 friends remember to type, "Hope it's a great one!" on my wall for my birthday, how many people "like" my accomplishments and opinions, or how many people "follow" me.

And yet, for the hundreds of "friends" out there, how many could really respond in a time of need?  How many actually know what's going on in my life beyond vague status updates?  How much of my life is based around something besides me?

I'm not anti-technology.  I'm just pro-reality in addition to the technology I use.  I begin to worry when I notice I would rather just text someone than call, or drop something off on their doorstep rather than visit, or send them a message rather than have a face-to-face conversation.  Because if I want to be able to walk up and say, "Hey--wanna slide?"  it's going to take a little more real person-to-person interaction.

So, here are my new rules:
1.  Answer the phone if you can.  Right then.  
2.  Don't text unless you can't call.  
3.  Talk to people and ask them yourself rather than looking it up on Facebook.
4.  Don't judge anyone you haven't had a face-to-face conversation with and actually know 
(Although "Don't judge anyone." would probably be better...) 
5.  If you're dropping something off, talk to whoever comes to the door.
6.  Sit by new people and find out what their story is.  
7.  Deal with confrontation right in the moment when possible.  Don't let someone else figure it out for you.  
8.  Ignore what you learned as a kid.  Talk to strangers. 
9.  Don't be afraid to be the first one to start a conversation.  
10. Do something that scares you or is out of your comfort zone every single day. 

In a world that is sooo smart, I'd say the smartest thing we can do sometimes is take a lesson from someone who's two.  Just "assume the sale."  Ask.  Expect things to work out.

After all, who wouldn't want to slide?  

"Whose idea was this again?"